Thursday, July 31, 2008

Sunday Bloody Sunday

On a sunny Sunday afternoon, sitting on the sofa of your drawing room, there aren’t many things you will be afraid of; not the usual things at least except of Monday! You know the Saturday night is gone- you had fun but then that is lost along with the hangover from those vodka shots. Sunday morning shoots into your blood that venom which you fight all week long- laziness. An utter desire to walk out of this rat race and take a time out! You want to go on, but it all so tough now. Monday seems like bonded slavery!
Sunday afternoon is the scariest of all - scarier than a night in haunted house. Mind is a very powerful machine and whenever let to run on its own, churns out things you don’t want to know, things long forgotten, things you don’t want to think about, things you wish, things you miss, things you desire and things you will never have. Between this eternal battle of reality and dreams somewhere mind duped in the yellowness of Sunday afternoon plays the devil’s advocate. It makes your heart go crazy about things you love and things you want, while remind you of the utter futileness of such efforts; and you sit there like a lonely warrior unsure of the side to take; watch it conquer you, tear you and wrench you till you are not sure if it was worth the battle. As I said, Monday could have been lot easier if not for the Sunday afternoon.

In any battle evenings are traditionally the time where dead soldiers are taken back to their camps and the last respect is paid to their brave souls. Here you walk the evening with a similar sadness, a strange silence in all the noise. Torn and tired after the war, you know these are the last few moments of peace before Monday takes over. While you dread that and wish that the time would stop and you can stay forever in that peace, it slips right through your fingers like sand.

Monday will come my friend, it’s inevitable! I don’t know if I will be prepared for it, will I be able to throw the poison out of my blood and jump in to it, or will I be swayed by other’s destiny and lack the courage to make my own. Whatever it may be – only time will decide! It’s a wide and wild river before I reach Saturday; while freedom, peace, tranquility and warmth beckons me there is a chance that I might never make it to the Saturday and there is only one way to find out- swim through the river. If I dive in- I know it will be a bloody battle, while the rewards are worth a life time, it will surely leave me without one if I lose. For now the temptation to quit is just too high- I hope I will have the strength and faith to carry on!

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