Sunday, May 10, 2009

Of Darkness and Liberation

A dark night… a lonely road… a fast car… and a shot of madness in his head…. He drove! In the short sighted visibility of the car head lights, he rested his faith and luck…anything beyond was darkness and unknown… anything beyond was approaching him at 120 kmph speed but he didn’t know if it was an open road or wall of stone… but he drove!

It was a dark night… no stars in the sky…a lonely moon giving shapes and forms to the expanding darkness that surrounded him. He was scared. He shot furtive glances towards those shapes… he didn’t know what they were and he didn’t know what to expect….There was a constant sound… a snarl… a giggle… a playful demeanor….someone was there …someone watching him…. Someone toying with him and his fate… a much mightier force …and he was his object of play for that night. He was scared!

A pair of brilliant balls of fire fast approached him from the opposite direction…some company at last! Starved of any company... unconsciously he drove towards them…positioning himself almost on the collision course. As if even the brief moment for which that truck will pass right next to him he will feel some level of companionship… which he will store…savor for the rest of the journey. As the those pair of lights came nearer, he realized that that they were just too bright for him to handle… he couldn’t be on his own anymore… he lost his view of the road… he lost control...he was going for a head on collision…and for all those long micro seconds … he knew.. but he couldn’t move…he had accepted that collision as a collateral for that companionship…. He had given up!

 Truck swerved at the last second… sparing his life! And for those seconds … and many more following them, blinded as he sat...he was lost in his dreams. He dreamt of himself as a child… his parents… his friends… his home… of the mango tree in the courtyard…and the fields beyond … and the hills and river beyond them all… he felt so small…. He felt so much at home… he was at peace! Another car honked and whizzed past him… he was awake!

A soul burdened with failures… expectations un-met… promises un- kept…and all those things it hadn’t come to terms with… felt too heavy for him to carry…but then in that instant… in that sudden flash of light …when he thought he was dying he met another him… the unburdened him… where he wasn’t the centre of the world… when he had hopes and dreams bigger than those hills beyond… when his mind was as open as those huge fields… when his life was more than an appraisal report... when he was alive!

A hint of light filled up the sky… a warm glow of a distant hope… and suddenly the darkness surrounding him was washed with muted colors… revealing their identity...he wasn't scared anymore! He could see, on his right, the river now… beautiful pristine blue… it twisted and turned playfully around the bends… jumping with joy and energy...and he felt.. his life wasn’t such a waste after all… he wasn’t so lonely after all… there was more to him than he has made out to be….than what people expect of him. There was so much more to do... there are so many dreams to chase... there were so many more lives to live and then in that instant... he was liberated!